Well....today is one of those "milestones" that I knew we'd eventually hit, but that I was cringing about doing so.
Asher said his first "bad word" this morning.
For awhile now, he has been saying "Sit" when he is supposed to "sit down." His babysitter informed me that it doesn't always sound like "sit" but a "naughty word" that is very similar. I was aware of this, and have heard him say it a few times, only in relation to his actions (for instance, when he was sitting himself down on a chair).
This morning, Asher was eating his breakfast & Jake & I were trying to get out the door to work on time. For some reason, Jake utters "$#!+"
And, out of the mouth of my dear boy...he repeats.... "$#!+"
I'm pretty sure that time he didn't mean "Sit."
Monday, June 29, 2009
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Hilarious.
A recent exchange at our house during dinner.
Asher: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (*LOUD SCREAM)
Me: (a la Austin Powers) Asher, are you having trouble controlling THE VOLUME OF YOUR VOICE?
Asher: No.
Asher: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! (*LOUD SCREAM)
Me: (a la Austin Powers) Asher, are you having trouble controlling THE VOLUME OF YOUR VOICE?
Asher: No.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
"Drama Like Your Mama"
I've never tried to hide the fact that I am quite dramatic. I can remember going to see the musical Cats with my parents when I was probably about 6 years old. My mom & dad bought me the double cassette tape of the music from Cats, and every day my mom would turn on my tape recorder to wake me up with that music. By the time it came to be the evening of the performance my mom had to remind me that it was the actors & actresses' "turn" to sing the songs. So, although I did not get to perform them that night, I would be happy to "perform" for any family or friends at a social gathering. I clearly remember gathering some family around in the living room at my grandparents' house, and then monologuing "Announcing, the cat, who can now be reborn....and come back....to a different...Jellicle life. FOR WAITING UP THERE IS THE HEAVYSIDE LAYER, with wonders...one Jellicle...only can see. And Jellicles ask. Because Jellicles dare. WHO. WILL IT BE?!" I know. I was probably an annoying child.
Anyway, Asher has a bit of a flair for the dramatic as well. My mom loves to say "Drama like your mama!" when he does something particularly fantastic. I could just hear my mom's voice the other day when he did something quite hilarious, but oh so dramatic.
Sadie dog is a very sloppy drinker. She slops water all around her bowl, and all across the floor. We love her just the same, but we are constantly mopping up puddles.
The other day Asher slipped on some water that was about 10 feet from Sadie's bowl (I told you she's sloppy!). He fell on his back and hit his head and began crying. I rushed over to him and picked him up and held him. Once I had soothed him, I put him down on the floor. He quickly rushed back to the spot where he had fallen. I followed him over there so that he wouldn't fall again. What I saw just made me want to laugh. He moved his foot back & forth over the water on the floor. Then he sat down easily, layed down, and began "crying." I picked him up again and cuddled him, while I mopped up the water with a towel. When the floor was dry, I put Asher down again, and guess what he did? Went to the same spot, "fell down" and began to "cry" again. This time I just had to ignore him, leave the room, and laugh to myself "Drama like your mama!"
Anyway, Asher has a bit of a flair for the dramatic as well. My mom loves to say "Drama like your mama!" when he does something particularly fantastic. I could just hear my mom's voice the other day when he did something quite hilarious, but oh so dramatic.
Sadie dog is a very sloppy drinker. She slops water all around her bowl, and all across the floor. We love her just the same, but we are constantly mopping up puddles.
The other day Asher slipped on some water that was about 10 feet from Sadie's bowl (I told you she's sloppy!). He fell on his back and hit his head and began crying. I rushed over to him and picked him up and held him. Once I had soothed him, I put him down on the floor. He quickly rushed back to the spot where he had fallen. I followed him over there so that he wouldn't fall again. What I saw just made me want to laugh. He moved his foot back & forth over the water on the floor. Then he sat down easily, layed down, and began "crying." I picked him up again and cuddled him, while I mopped up the water with a towel. When the floor was dry, I put Asher down again, and guess what he did? Went to the same spot, "fell down" and began to "cry" again. This time I just had to ignore him, leave the room, and laugh to myself "Drama like your mama!"
Thursday, June 11, 2009
The Simple Things
There’ve been some simple things lately that have been bringing me joy in the midst of a difficult/stressful few weeks.
- Sleeping with the windows open on cool nights
- Watching Asher stretch in the morning
- Lunch and laughter with a dear friend
- Sister hugs
- Cheering for my brother at his baseball games
- Sadie snuggles
- Seeing children playing “Ring-around the Rosie”
- Help offered from loved ones when I need it most
- Asher laughing and cheering for me while I workout
- K’s graduation from high school
- Pandora.com
- Losing myself in books
- Hot showers
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Hmmm....
I've seen this bumper sticker two days in a row...on my way to work. Do you think it's an omen?
Should I be worried?!
Friday, May 22, 2009
Chatterbox
Asher is a chatterbox. I don’t know where he gets it…honestly!
He’s been saying “da-da” for a long time, but just recently it seems his language has exploded. He is now almost 16 months old. The word of the week seems to be “Sadie dog”…but sometimes it’s “daddy.” “Mama” comes out when he’s in distress or upset…but of course! Our last visit to the Dr. showed him at 25 pounds! He seems to enjoy most foods, but he has gotten a little bit picky about vegetables. Typical kid!
We recently moved my sister into her first house (yeah for homeownership, I’m SO proud of you, Ash!). We (well…Ashley mostly) was busily painting her new bedroom a bright green color, and so she had an exposed bulb in a lamp for better light. Of course, with Asher toddling around everywhere, he was really interested in that light bulb at his level! We rushed quickly to him as we watched him approaching the lamp, and said “Ouch! Hot!” So, as you might guess…he now enjoys saying, “Ouch…hot!” Just yesterday we were in the car and he was saying “Ouch….hot….dillil (Dylan)!” It truly is glorious to hear. The only thing that DOESN'T sound so sweet is the word "No" which he finally said for the first time yesterday....UH OH!
When I pick him up from the sitter’s, lately she’s said he has talked all day long…and I don’t doubt it! He jabbers to himself constantly, but he also responds to verbal interaction. For instance, if we attempt to redirect him to a more suitable activity (than sticking his hand in the dog’s water dish) he will say “Thank you!” And though we’ve been trying to teach him to sign for quite some time, just recently he’s really begun signing “Eat” when he wants to be fed, “More” when he would like more food/drink, and “Please” when he is requesting something. Just the other day I picked him up from my sister’s place where he was hanging for about an hour, and she said “One….” and he followed with an emphatic “Two!”
He loves to play hide and seek…and just rolls with laughter when anyone will play with him. He thinks Uncle Dylan is especially silly…and even if Dylan just walks into the room, Asher squeals with delight. He is very good at waving & saying “Byebye” now, and if you’re lucky, he might even blow you a kiss! Every day is a new adventure with him.
He still loves to drum on anything....I'm not surprised one bit. Asher's birthdad, A, is a drummer, and so is Uncle Dylan. He has had lots of exposure to instruments and music in his young life, and always relishes a chance to tap on his own special drum, pots and pans with a wooden spoon, or Uncle D's very own "real" sticks! Playing the piano, whether toy or real, always elicits a huge smile, too.
We've gotten so many comments lately on how big he's gotten...how much he's changed, what a beautiful child he is. His big blue eyes and long eyelashes, his blonde curls, his flirtatious little grin (with 4 teeth in front & 3 more making their way into his mouth), and his inquisitive and determined nature seem to endear him to everyone he meets.
Can you tell I'm such a proud mommy?!
He’s been saying “da-da” for a long time, but just recently it seems his language has exploded. He is now almost 16 months old. The word of the week seems to be “Sadie dog”…but sometimes it’s “daddy.” “Mama” comes out when he’s in distress or upset…but of course! Our last visit to the Dr. showed him at 25 pounds! He seems to enjoy most foods, but he has gotten a little bit picky about vegetables. Typical kid!
We recently moved my sister into her first house (yeah for homeownership, I’m SO proud of you, Ash!). We (well…Ashley mostly) was busily painting her new bedroom a bright green color, and so she had an exposed bulb in a lamp for better light. Of course, with Asher toddling around everywhere, he was really interested in that light bulb at his level! We rushed quickly to him as we watched him approaching the lamp, and said “Ouch! Hot!” So, as you might guess…he now enjoys saying, “Ouch…hot!” Just yesterday we were in the car and he was saying “Ouch….hot….dillil (Dylan)!” It truly is glorious to hear. The only thing that DOESN'T sound so sweet is the word "No" which he finally said for the first time yesterday....UH OH!
When I pick him up from the sitter’s, lately she’s said he has talked all day long…and I don’t doubt it! He jabbers to himself constantly, but he also responds to verbal interaction. For instance, if we attempt to redirect him to a more suitable activity (than sticking his hand in the dog’s water dish) he will say “Thank you!” And though we’ve been trying to teach him to sign for quite some time, just recently he’s really begun signing “Eat” when he wants to be fed, “More” when he would like more food/drink, and “Please” when he is requesting something. Just the other day I picked him up from my sister’s place where he was hanging for about an hour, and she said “One….” and he followed with an emphatic “Two!”
He loves to play hide and seek…and just rolls with laughter when anyone will play with him. He thinks Uncle Dylan is especially silly…and even if Dylan just walks into the room, Asher squeals with delight. He is very good at waving & saying “Byebye” now, and if you’re lucky, he might even blow you a kiss! Every day is a new adventure with him.
He still loves to drum on anything....I'm not surprised one bit. Asher's birthdad, A, is a drummer, and so is Uncle Dylan. He has had lots of exposure to instruments and music in his young life, and always relishes a chance to tap on his own special drum, pots and pans with a wooden spoon, or Uncle D's very own "real" sticks! Playing the piano, whether toy or real, always elicits a huge smile, too.
We've gotten so many comments lately on how big he's gotten...how much he's changed, what a beautiful child he is. His big blue eyes and long eyelashes, his blonde curls, his flirtatious little grin (with 4 teeth in front & 3 more making their way into his mouth), and his inquisitive and determined nature seem to endear him to everyone he meets.
Can you tell I'm such a proud mommy?!
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Our Beautiful Boy
Asher is now 14 months old. He is walking and VERY busy! He loves to figure out how things work. He likes to say "Go!" "Sadie dog" "Daddy" "Mommy" "E I E I O" "Thank You" "Byebye" & "Baby." He has 4 teeth. He is a very determined little boy he loves to laugh. Here is a picture update so you can see what's been keeping me so busy from blogging!
Hunting for Easter eggs with dad. "Like my cool shades?" 
Random funny picture.
Look at that face...
Hanging with Aunt Ash...
"Aren't me & my daddy handsome guys?"
Funny face...
Celebrating St. Patrick's Day in style!
"Here's me & mommy!"
Uncle D & I practice piano & drums together...
"I'm always on the go at Grandma & Papa Bear's house..."
BEEP BEEP!
Playing the piano on Easter Sunday.
Hunting for Easter eggs with dad. "Like my cool shades?" 
Random funny picture.
Look at that face...
Hanging with Aunt Ash...
"Aren't me & my daddy handsome guys?"
Funny face...
Celebrating St. Patrick's Day in style!
"Here's me & mommy!"
Uncle D & I practice piano & drums together...
"I'm always on the go at Grandma & Papa Bear's house..."
BEEP BEEP!
Too fabulous not to share...
This is the delightful Roquefort Pear Salad recipe I found at AllRecipes.com. At Christmas time I was looking for a recipe that contained pears, as we had a bunch sent to us at work and we needed to use them up before they went bad. So, for our staff luncheon, I made this. Most recently, as pictured here, I made it again for Easter lunch, and today I'm making it to take to a friend's 30th birthday party.It's too fabulous not to share with all of you. The only changes I've made to the recipe are to use a spring mix variety of lettuce and balsamic vinegar instead of red wine vinegar. It's sweet with the candied pecans and pears, and tangy with the dressing and bleu cheese.
I hope you'll try it & let me know what you think!
Courtesy of AllRecipes.com
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Happy Belated Easter!
A bit late, but this gives you a little peek into how big our boy is getting! :) More pictures to come soon!
Friday, April 17, 2009
Quiet Moment
Well, I've been doing this mom thing for over 14 months now. You'd think I'd be better at it.
Some things I'm pretty good at. Playing, laughing, reading stories, singing songs, entertaining...giving my kid things he likes, such as mandarin oranges, chicken nuggets, and ravioli.
Other things...I'm not so good at....
For instance, I get really nervous about hanging out with other moms & their kids. I feel like they will judge me, will see how incompetent I really am, will realize that I am really a fraud or something. I mean, I didn't even send Christmas cards this year...my kid's first Christmas, and I didn't even send photo cards. As every other friend (with or without kids) sent us a beautiful, festive Christmas card, the 5 booklets of "Baby Jesus & Madonna" stamps sit idle in my wallet, 3 months later. What kind of great mommy is that?
And I don't always have a lot of patience....I sometimes get short with Asher, or annoyed that he doesn't "listen," and then I realize I am expecting way too much from this little, tiny person. I'm sure every mom has her moments, but I feel guilty about that, too.
And let's not even talk about the state of my house. Um...yeah...lets just not.
Lately I've been tired. I think Asher is getting ready to cut some more teeth, and every night for the past week he's woken up screaming, and it's sometimes difficult to get him settled down.
The other night was no exception....he was screaming his little head off, and I went into his room to comfort him. I picked him up and crawled back into our bed, and once I had soothed him a little, I began to rock him.
And then I had this "moment." A moment, in the quiet, dark night, mid-week, sometime in the middle of the night....I surprised myself at having such a coherent thought at such a ridiculous hour. I sat there, rocking my precious son, and I thought of K. The words just popped into my head... "She chose me for this."
Yes, K had chosen me to be Asher's mommy. She had picked me to enjoy the fun & wonderful parts, and she had picked me for the difficult and tiresome moments, too. And here we were, when the rest of the neighborhood was sleeping, and K probably was, too, but I was not.
"She chose me for this," I said to myself. I took that quiet moment to hold him a little tighter, to smell his hair, to kiss his cheeks, and just relish the moment. I thanked God that she had seen something in me...certainly not perfection or claiming to be a pro, but someone that she could trust, and it just humbled me so much.
Some things I'm pretty good at. Playing, laughing, reading stories, singing songs, entertaining...giving my kid things he likes, such as mandarin oranges, chicken nuggets, and ravioli.
Other things...I'm not so good at....
For instance, I get really nervous about hanging out with other moms & their kids. I feel like they will judge me, will see how incompetent I really am, will realize that I am really a fraud or something. I mean, I didn't even send Christmas cards this year...my kid's first Christmas, and I didn't even send photo cards. As every other friend (with or without kids) sent us a beautiful, festive Christmas card, the 5 booklets of "Baby Jesus & Madonna" stamps sit idle in my wallet, 3 months later. What kind of great mommy is that?
And I don't always have a lot of patience....I sometimes get short with Asher, or annoyed that he doesn't "listen," and then I realize I am expecting way too much from this little, tiny person. I'm sure every mom has her moments, but I feel guilty about that, too.
And let's not even talk about the state of my house. Um...yeah...lets just not.
Lately I've been tired. I think Asher is getting ready to cut some more teeth, and every night for the past week he's woken up screaming, and it's sometimes difficult to get him settled down.
The other night was no exception....he was screaming his little head off, and I went into his room to comfort him. I picked him up and crawled back into our bed, and once I had soothed him a little, I began to rock him.
And then I had this "moment." A moment, in the quiet, dark night, mid-week, sometime in the middle of the night....I surprised myself at having such a coherent thought at such a ridiculous hour. I sat there, rocking my precious son, and I thought of K. The words just popped into my head... "She chose me for this."
Yes, K had chosen me to be Asher's mommy. She had picked me to enjoy the fun & wonderful parts, and she had picked me for the difficult and tiresome moments, too. And here we were, when the rest of the neighborhood was sleeping, and K probably was, too, but I was not.
"She chose me for this," I said to myself. I took that quiet moment to hold him a little tighter, to smell his hair, to kiss his cheeks, and just relish the moment. I thanked God that she had seen something in me...certainly not perfection or claiming to be a pro, but someone that she could trust, and it just humbled me so much.
Monday, March 09, 2009
Ridiculous Snapshot
Picture this.
Roly poly Asher. He doesn't sit still...he is a constant blur of motion around our house, and he's not even walking yet.
Then picture this.
The need to cut his fingernails.
Seriously. I know God has a sense of humor when I must undertake this task.
So....to provide you with a mental ridiculous snapshot, the scene goes like this:
Asher & I, both in pajamas, both with bare feet. He's wearing Christmas PJs...3 months after Christmas. We are in the bathroom of our house and I have set him into his empty plastic bathtub on the floor to "confine" him just a little. I know that Eric Carle's The Very Busy Spider that is within arms' reach will not be enough to keep him busy while I snip, so, I grab him his green Blue's Clues toothbrush. He's enamored with that thing while I have a tight hold & attempt to clip his tiny little sharp claws...er...nails.
Good thing I had bare feet....the better to grip the floor as I wrestled my kid!
Roly poly Asher. He doesn't sit still...he is a constant blur of motion around our house, and he's not even walking yet.
Then picture this.
The need to cut his fingernails.
Seriously. I know God has a sense of humor when I must undertake this task.
So....to provide you with a mental ridiculous snapshot, the scene goes like this:
Asher & I, both in pajamas, both with bare feet. He's wearing Christmas PJs...3 months after Christmas. We are in the bathroom of our house and I have set him into his empty plastic bathtub on the floor to "confine" him just a little. I know that Eric Carle's The Very Busy Spider that is within arms' reach will not be enough to keep him busy while I snip, so, I grab him his green Blue's Clues toothbrush. He's enamored with that thing while I have a tight hold & attempt to clip his tiny little sharp claws...er...nails.
Good thing I had bare feet....the better to grip the floor as I wrestled my kid!
Have a little lemonade...
I recently received a blog award from my friend Cortney. She passed it along to me, letting me know that she thinks my blog is pretty sweet...Essentially, in a "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade" kind of way.
Cortney and I live in the same city & met each other when we were planning our weddings. In our married lives, we've both battled infertility. She has always been compassionate and hopeful about our road to parenthood through adoption, and I am SO excited for her & her husband, as they have recently become pregnant after 4 years of infertility!
I think, for the most part, I'm a glass half full kind of gal. But honestly, there are days when I really have to be conscious about choosing to be positive. Some things that help me right myself when I'm having a rough day include: listening to music (K-Love or other uplifting radio stations), something tasty to drink or eat like good coffee or ice cream, taking a walk with my dog & my boys, and laughing with people I love. Another way to express all that I feel is to write this blog. I am so blessed to be able to share our story in this manner, and I have gained a lot of support and encouragement from this avenue for my thoughts.
So, in the spirit of hope, encouragement, and positive attitude, I nominate the following friends:
The rules are easy........
1. Put the logo on your blog.
2. Nominate blogs that show great attitude or gratitude.
3. Link to your nominees within your post.
4. Share the love......link to the person from who you received your award.
Monday, March 02, 2009
I had to laugh...
I ran out to Aldi's tonight for milk...(Shhh...don't tell my husband I went to Aldi's after dark!) and ended up with an entire large canvas bag filled with groceries (I must have needed it, otherwise I wouldn't have purchased it, right?!)
My dear husband requested just one item...Bud Light, so I knew I'd have to make a trip to another store to oblige him. You see, he has given up pop for Lent, so of course, replacing it with beer just makes sense! (?)
Anyway, I stopped at a CVS on the way home with the singular purpose of picking up some Bud Light for my beloved. I swear I have NO idea how those Starburst Jellybeans made it into my hand, as well....
As I was standing in line, two college students were in front of me. The first was buying those green headbands with the sparkly springy shamrocks. The clerk asked if she wanted all of them, as she had brought up an entire plastic package of them. She turned to her friend who was waiting ahead of me to purchase her box o' wine, and asked if they needed all 6 of the springy shamrock headbands. "Oh yeah...get them all." "Ok, we want them all. How much are they?" The clerk tells her $2.99 each. Shamrock headband girl seems like maybe that wasn't such a great idea. Boxed wine girl tells her they definitely need 6 sparkly shamrock headbands, naming who all would be the recipients of the headbands, and that she'd be sure to pay her back.
I wanted to laugh. It didn't bother me that there was a line & that my arm was falling asleep from holding the big-ass carton of beer. I was simply amused at the ridiculousness of the conversation...how their most difficult decision today just may have been how many $2.99 springy shamrock headbands to buy.
And then, boxed wine girl said, "Oh, look! Bird whistles...2 for $3. Do you need one?" Shamrock headband girl turns to look and says "Oh, yeah! Definitely" like this was boxed wine girl's best idea so far.
The funny thing is, I was those girls....about 7 years ago! Maybe they needed a diversion from studying....perhaps they had a singular intention like me, of just going in for the wine, but the bird-shaped whistle & sparkly shamrock headbands were just too fun to pass up. Normally these days I would have been at CVS picking up yet ANOTHER amoxicillan prescription for dear Asher (3 ear infections in 3 months), or grabbing a gallon of milk on my lunch hour. When did I get so OLD? Is it scary or sad to know that I graduated from college almost 5 years ago?
My dear husband requested just one item...Bud Light, so I knew I'd have to make a trip to another store to oblige him. You see, he has given up pop for Lent, so of course, replacing it with beer just makes sense! (?)
Anyway, I stopped at a CVS on the way home with the singular purpose of picking up some Bud Light for my beloved. I swear I have NO idea how those Starburst Jellybeans made it into my hand, as well....
As I was standing in line, two college students were in front of me. The first was buying those green headbands with the sparkly springy shamrocks. The clerk asked if she wanted all of them, as she had brought up an entire plastic package of them. She turned to her friend who was waiting ahead of me to purchase her box o' wine, and asked if they needed all 6 of the springy shamrock headbands. "Oh yeah...get them all." "Ok, we want them all. How much are they?" The clerk tells her $2.99 each. Shamrock headband girl seems like maybe that wasn't such a great idea. Boxed wine girl tells her they definitely need 6 sparkly shamrock headbands, naming who all would be the recipients of the headbands, and that she'd be sure to pay her back.
I wanted to laugh. It didn't bother me that there was a line & that my arm was falling asleep from holding the big-ass carton of beer. I was simply amused at the ridiculousness of the conversation...how their most difficult decision today just may have been how many $2.99 springy shamrock headbands to buy.
And then, boxed wine girl said, "Oh, look! Bird whistles...2 for $3. Do you need one?" Shamrock headband girl turns to look and says "Oh, yeah! Definitely" like this was boxed wine girl's best idea so far.
The funny thing is, I was those girls....about 7 years ago! Maybe they needed a diversion from studying....perhaps they had a singular intention like me, of just going in for the wine, but the bird-shaped whistle & sparkly shamrock headbands were just too fun to pass up. Normally these days I would have been at CVS picking up yet ANOTHER amoxicillan prescription for dear Asher (3 ear infections in 3 months), or grabbing a gallon of milk on my lunch hour. When did I get so OLD? Is it scary or sad to know that I graduated from college almost 5 years ago?
Sunday, February 22, 2009
The Notebook
I am not often speechless.
But I was.
I even knew of this gift...before it was given, yet still, holding it's soft, recycled paper cover in my hands, I was overwhelmed.
It wasn't heavy. In fact, it was very light...but the immensity of what an amazingly gracious gift it was grounded me...excited me.
Jake and I were to be the keepers of this gift. To keep it safe until it's time. Whenever he's ready or whenever he's needing it.
It was Asher's first birthday party and there was a flurry of wrapping paper, relatives, laughter, noise. In a quiet moment in my parent's dining room, she pulled the notebook from a simple plastic grocery bag and said she wanted us to have it. She pushed it into my hands.
I knew what it was. It was spiral bound, and the cover had leaves imprinted in green ink. Some of them colored in with the green printing ink, but others in her own hand....purple and orange marker, a black pen...
I thanked her. Silly it seems now...inadequate words for such a gift. I mean, how do you truly express how thankful you are for something so personal, heartfelt, and treasured?
She had to leave soon after. I asked if she was sure...sure about giving it to us...sure it was for us to have. She smiled & said "Of course!" in her way...and told me that it was always meant for him. Always meant for him. My hands must have been shaking as I accepting it from her...
Later that evening, Jake & I opened it together. I read, but I could hardly speak. I was awash with tears...overwhelmed with feelings of sadness, hopefulness, happiness, and humbleness. She tore my heart and she lifted it high. The words I read were broken with sobs and sniffles, my face was blotchy and runny, and yet a smile on my face. I was so moved I clasped at my heart in both anguish and joy.
Asher's beloved birthmom had given him a most precious gift that only she could give him. She gave him the gift of her words...from the day she visited the Doctor and learned of him and saw him growing inside of her, to days after his first birthday. Over a year's worth of entries to him. She wrote a letter to "us"...before she even knew who we were. The original "list" she created to help her to choose the best family for her baby is there. She poured out her heart....her sadness, her happiness, her hopes and fears, and her messages to him inside this simple notebook. If he ever wonders, doubts, or otherwise second-guesses, the answers are there to reassure him.
I just cannot put into words how meaningful that is to Jake & I, as Asher's parents, to possess for him. It's overwhelming to understand how blessed we are with K in our lives.
But I was.
I even knew of this gift...before it was given, yet still, holding it's soft, recycled paper cover in my hands, I was overwhelmed.
It wasn't heavy. In fact, it was very light...but the immensity of what an amazingly gracious gift it was grounded me...excited me.
Jake and I were to be the keepers of this gift. To keep it safe until it's time. Whenever he's ready or whenever he's needing it.
It was Asher's first birthday party and there was a flurry of wrapping paper, relatives, laughter, noise. In a quiet moment in my parent's dining room, she pulled the notebook from a simple plastic grocery bag and said she wanted us to have it. She pushed it into my hands.
I knew what it was. It was spiral bound, and the cover had leaves imprinted in green ink. Some of them colored in with the green printing ink, but others in her own hand....purple and orange marker, a black pen...
I thanked her. Silly it seems now...inadequate words for such a gift. I mean, how do you truly express how thankful you are for something so personal, heartfelt, and treasured?
She had to leave soon after. I asked if she was sure...sure about giving it to us...sure it was for us to have. She smiled & said "Of course!" in her way...and told me that it was always meant for him. Always meant for him. My hands must have been shaking as I accepting it from her...
Later that evening, Jake & I opened it together. I read, but I could hardly speak. I was awash with tears...overwhelmed with feelings of sadness, hopefulness, happiness, and humbleness. She tore my heart and she lifted it high. The words I read were broken with sobs and sniffles, my face was blotchy and runny, and yet a smile on my face. I was so moved I clasped at my heart in both anguish and joy.
Asher's beloved birthmom had given him a most precious gift that only she could give him. She gave him the gift of her words...from the day she visited the Doctor and learned of him and saw him growing inside of her, to days after his first birthday. Over a year's worth of entries to him. She wrote a letter to "us"...before she even knew who we were. The original "list" she created to help her to choose the best family for her baby is there. She poured out her heart....her sadness, her happiness, her hopes and fears, and her messages to him inside this simple notebook. If he ever wonders, doubts, or otherwise second-guesses, the answers are there to reassure him.
I just cannot put into words how meaningful that is to Jake & I, as Asher's parents, to possess for him. It's overwhelming to understand how blessed we are with K in our lives.
Oh, Billy (the Kid(ney))...
I wish this blog wasn't so neglected.
There are many times throughout my day when I think I'd love to blog about something....but I just never have the time at that moment, or when I DO have a spare moment, I am just too exhausted to write coherently enough to please/entertain all of you dear readers!
Anyway....life has been busy between surgery, a non-stop baby, a messy house, a visiting grandma, and general stuff like work, laundry, and sleep.
On January 27 I had an endopyelotomy scheduled at the University Hospital. The plan was to go into the ureter, find any blockages and cut them out, and remove the stent that's been in since October & replace it with another one. When I arrived at the hospital, the person in front of me asked when he'd be called because they'd been waiting an hour & 45 minutes since the time they were SUPPOSED to be called! Needless to say, we sat around & waited until after 3:15 to even be taken back to get prepped! We busied ourselves with books, DVDs and knitting/crocheting prayer shawls.
Leave it to my husband to say something goofy...when the resident was letting me know the risks of being under anaesthesia & they needed me to sign the paper authorizing it, Jake says, "Sign your life away!" Thanks, honey...for those "words of wisdom?!" Oh....DEAR!
They believe the stent that was put in place in October may have "opened" things up because no blockages needed to be excised, and I came out of the anasthesia easily. I was lucky to come home that evening to be well taken care of by my family.
This stent is working out much better for me. It's been in almost a month and I rarely have pain. Once it's out, I'll have another kidney functioning test, but I expect no problems with the results. Thanks for all your prayers for Billy the Kid(ney) and me!
There are many times throughout my day when I think I'd love to blog about something....but I just never have the time at that moment, or when I DO have a spare moment, I am just too exhausted to write coherently enough to please/entertain all of you dear readers!
Anyway....life has been busy between surgery, a non-stop baby, a messy house, a visiting grandma, and general stuff like work, laundry, and sleep.
On January 27 I had an endopyelotomy scheduled at the University Hospital. The plan was to go into the ureter, find any blockages and cut them out, and remove the stent that's been in since October & replace it with another one. When I arrived at the hospital, the person in front of me asked when he'd be called because they'd been waiting an hour & 45 minutes since the time they were SUPPOSED to be called! Needless to say, we sat around & waited until after 3:15 to even be taken back to get prepped! We busied ourselves with books, DVDs and knitting/crocheting prayer shawls.
Leave it to my husband to say something goofy...when the resident was letting me know the risks of being under anaesthesia & they needed me to sign the paper authorizing it, Jake says, "Sign your life away!" Thanks, honey...for those "words of wisdom?!" Oh....DEAR!
They believe the stent that was put in place in October may have "opened" things up because no blockages needed to be excised, and I came out of the anasthesia easily. I was lucky to come home that evening to be well taken care of by my family.
This stent is working out much better for me. It's been in almost a month and I rarely have pain. Once it's out, I'll have another kidney functioning test, but I expect no problems with the results. Thanks for all your prayers for Billy the Kid(ney) and me!
Saturday, February 07, 2009
Birthday Cake!
Proof! Daddy tries his hand at decorating cupcakes - it was a success!
Mmmmm....Mommy doesn't look very happy. She thinks she got herself in over her head with this "fabulous" idea to make Asher his own monkey birthday cake & decorate it.
Frustrated.
OK. Let's do this. (My lovely sister begins her "paparazzi photos.")
Lookin' good & cheering up!
Look at that concentration....
Cracking up at Ashley...enough, paparazzi!
OK, that's it...my pastry bag is down....
I SAID! Drop the camera, paparazzi!
TA-DA! Monkey cupcakes awaiting their "big reveal."
Aren't they cute?!
Here's the monkey...he was pretty naked at this point.
Starting to look a little better...
A party animal?
My masterpiece...I think there's a reason parents usually only do this once.My hand was TIRED!
Happy First Birthday, Asher Joseph Leo!
Happy First Birthday, Asher Joseph Leo! Wednesday, February 04, 2009
A Year Ago Today...
A year ago today we got the call that changed our lives. We got the call saying we had been chosen.
Chosen to be parents.
One moment I was simply emailing with a a dear friend who was also a waiting and hopeful adoptive mom, "When will our babies come?" and moments later, my phone was ringing with our social worker's good news on the other end.
It was my dad's 55th birthday. My dad is a big man...quite imposing and sometimes "scary" looking. But he's such a tender-hearted, softy on the inside...don't tell him I told you, but he cries at TV commercials sometimes...My mom's nickname for him is "Bear" and it's a suitable moniker.
Anyway, what an exciting phone call to tell him, on his birthday, that we were heading to the hospital because we had been picked to be parents of a little boy who had been born two days before. We were cautiously optimistic that this little boy could be his grandson, and now, a year later, looking back, today was the day that my dad did become a grandpa for the first time. We now affectionately call him "Papa Bear."
Asher's birthday this year was another one of those days where I was feeling numerous emotions. Additionally, I wasn't feeling well at all, so I was feeling a lot of other things that day, too (I lost both my lunch AND my dinner & so missed out on a lot of our special boy's special day). It was, of course, a day to celebrate...but it still makes me think about the fact that we were busy making a big purchase at Best Buy on February 2nd, Groundhogs Day, instead of being there for our son's first breaths.
Then, he was 7 pounds 15 ounces and 19 inches long. He had dark blue eyes and black hair.
Today, he is 23 pounds 3 ounces and 29 inches long. Now he has bright blue eyes and precious blonde, curls.
He has grown SO much. He DOES so much! He is moving non-stop...cruising the furniture, crawling so quickly, and even climbing stairs. He still loves every food that he's tried, and now if he can feed it to himself, he doesn't want anything to do with the pureed stuff we try to give him. We continue to try to teach him baby signs, and he is getting the hang of it, slowly but surely. He loves to jabber and say "dadadada" and sometimes "Sa-die da" and every once in awhile "mama." He amazes us (and exhausts us) every moment of every day.
Every day we experience the amazing love and joy of our son and I thank God that we have been blessed with the gift of life that we were offered a year ago today.
Chosen to be parents.
One moment I was simply emailing with a a dear friend who was also a waiting and hopeful adoptive mom, "When will our babies come?" and moments later, my phone was ringing with our social worker's good news on the other end.
It was my dad's 55th birthday. My dad is a big man...quite imposing and sometimes "scary" looking. But he's such a tender-hearted, softy on the inside...don't tell him I told you, but he cries at TV commercials sometimes...My mom's nickname for him is "Bear" and it's a suitable moniker.
Anyway, what an exciting phone call to tell him, on his birthday, that we were heading to the hospital because we had been picked to be parents of a little boy who had been born two days before. We were cautiously optimistic that this little boy could be his grandson, and now, a year later, looking back, today was the day that my dad did become a grandpa for the first time. We now affectionately call him "Papa Bear."
Asher's birthday this year was another one of those days where I was feeling numerous emotions. Additionally, I wasn't feeling well at all, so I was feeling a lot of other things that day, too (I lost both my lunch AND my dinner & so missed out on a lot of our special boy's special day). It was, of course, a day to celebrate...but it still makes me think about the fact that we were busy making a big purchase at Best Buy on February 2nd, Groundhogs Day, instead of being there for our son's first breaths.
Then, he was 7 pounds 15 ounces and 19 inches long. He had dark blue eyes and black hair.
Today, he is 23 pounds 3 ounces and 29 inches long. Now he has bright blue eyes and precious blonde, curls.
He has grown SO much. He DOES so much! He is moving non-stop...cruising the furniture, crawling so quickly, and even climbing stairs. He still loves every food that he's tried, and now if he can feed it to himself, he doesn't want anything to do with the pureed stuff we try to give him. We continue to try to teach him baby signs, and he is getting the hang of it, slowly but surely. He loves to jabber and say "dadadada" and sometimes "Sa-die da" and every once in awhile "mama." He amazes us (and exhausts us) every moment of every day.
Every day we experience the amazing love and joy of our son and I thank God that we have been blessed with the gift of life that we were offered a year ago today.
Friday, January 16, 2009
More FROZEN Fun...
So, remember this past summer when I had bronchitis & an ear infection & we had so much rain my husband got called to flood duty with the National Guard? Then remember how OUR basement flooded?
Fast forward to present day. Jake is on his way to be to Washington, D.C. to be security for the inauguration of Barack Obama. It's freezing outside...well, BELOW freezing...super cold...currently -26 degrees F. This morning I take a nice, very hot shower...flush the toilet...try to brush my teeth...NO cold water comes out of the tap.
Upon some inspection, I learn my cold water pipe is FROZEN. This can be terribly damaging, as the pipe can burst, and then I'd REALLY have a mess on my hands. It's just me, Sadie & Asher...*HELP*
I can't get a hold of my dad...he's in a meeting, my mom is at work, my sister is in a teacher's inservice, no answer from my in-laws...so I call my coworker's husband (the one who put in our sump pump). Thank goodness he came & RESCUED us this morning...he brought an industrial strength hair drier, found the pipe in the basement (which is on an outside wall with no isulation between the boards of the house & the bricks of the house!) & thawed us out. We now have cold water again! I have to leave the tap dripping to keep the water moving, and I also have a fan running to keep the warm air circulating...
*SIGH* The JOYS of homeownership...but seriously...why does this never happen when Jake is around?!
Fast forward to present day. Jake is on his way to be to Washington, D.C. to be security for the inauguration of Barack Obama. It's freezing outside...well, BELOW freezing...super cold...currently -26 degrees F. This morning I take a nice, very hot shower...flush the toilet...try to brush my teeth...NO cold water comes out of the tap.
Upon some inspection, I learn my cold water pipe is FROZEN. This can be terribly damaging, as the pipe can burst, and then I'd REALLY have a mess on my hands. It's just me, Sadie & Asher...*HELP*
I can't get a hold of my dad...he's in a meeting, my mom is at work, my sister is in a teacher's inservice, no answer from my in-laws...so I call my coworker's husband (the one who put in our sump pump). Thank goodness he came & RESCUED us this morning...he brought an industrial strength hair drier, found the pipe in the basement (which is on an outside wall with no isulation between the boards of the house & the bricks of the house!) & thawed us out. We now have cold water again! I have to leave the tap dripping to keep the water moving, and I also have a fan running to keep the warm air circulating...
*SIGH* The JOYS of homeownership...but seriously...why does this never happen when Jake is around?!
Friday, January 09, 2009
Lesson Learned
As I was loading Asher into the car yesterday morning, I see ice all over the seat next to him...I am standing there wondering if it's actually broken glass (it's not) or if it fell off my ice scraper (it didn't) when I realize it is a FROZEN POP that exploded all over the inside of my car! I come to this realization as I looked up (cue Hollywood movie pan with my face looking up to the ceiling with a reaction of horror). I accidentally left a few cans in the trunk for a few days and the remnants of one exploded pop were even clinging to the ceiling... I do think it's a saving grace that most of the "particles" were frozen, because it made for easier cleanup. My car even has the delightful aroma of Diet Cherry Pepsi now...Thank goodness for 9 degree Fahrenheit weather (I don't often say that!), my ice scraper brush & some clean up wipes (and the advice of a few good friends)!
So for all you folks who live in places where it gets cold enough to freeze, heed my advice: Don't leave full pop (soda, cokes, or cold drinks for all you folks who don't call carbonated beverages "pop") cans in your vehicle overnight. Lesson learned!
So for all you folks who live in places where it gets cold enough to freeze, heed my advice: Don't leave full pop (soda, cokes, or cold drinks for all you folks who don't call carbonated beverages "pop") cans in your vehicle overnight. Lesson learned!
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Asher's New Moves
The past few weeks have been very busy (obviously!) I apologize for my lack of blogging...and thank you to those of you who have asked where I was or said you were glad I'm "back!" I appreciate all those who "follow" along this crazy adventure!
On 12/29 we took Asher to a new babysitter. We had talked to her the day before & I informed her of all that Asher does/doesn't do. That evening at home after his first day hanging with new friends, I was cleaning his room and he was playing. All of a sudden he put the arm and leg motions together to equal a CRAWL! I was so excited that I got down on the floor with him and began clapping & saying "Yeah!" He looked at me like I had lost my mind...but it was a very proud mommy moment!
Considering he was just 4 days from being 11 months old, Jake & I were beginning to wonder if he was ever going to "get it." Now that he has, we're yearning for those days when he'd stay where we left him! Not only has he learned to crawl, but he began going from a prone position to a sitting position by himself, as well as pulling up on ANYTHING he can get his little hands on...all at the same time. It's true what they say...that things change overnight!
The next day when I took Asher back to the new sitter's I said, "Asher crawled for the first time last night!" Then I realized. He had probably not done it for the first time in my sight. I caught what I had said, and remarked, "Oh....I bet he crawled at your house yesterday, didn't he?" She turned away & gave the best babysitter answer: "No...of course not!" She DID find it humorous that I had just told her the day before that he didn't crawl and now he was.
Jake & I are taking a crash course in babyproofing and I don't think I've said "no no" & "no, please" more than I have in the past week. To top it off, this is exhausting! With all these new stunts, Asher has revealed to us a new part of his personality...his unrelenting determination.
Going to bed and taking naps has become a battle. He has no time to slow down now, and he doesn't want to miss out on any action. Therefore, on top of his exhausting new tricks, we're getting little sleep. And, although we're worn out, I can truly say it is a joy to be a parent! Asher's new stunts may give us some gray hairs, though...or rather, me some gray hairs, and Jake a few more! ;)
On 12/29 we took Asher to a new babysitter. We had talked to her the day before & I informed her of all that Asher does/doesn't do. That evening at home after his first day hanging with new friends, I was cleaning his room and he was playing. All of a sudden he put the arm and leg motions together to equal a CRAWL! I was so excited that I got down on the floor with him and began clapping & saying "Yeah!" He looked at me like I had lost my mind...but it was a very proud mommy moment!
Considering he was just 4 days from being 11 months old, Jake & I were beginning to wonder if he was ever going to "get it." Now that he has, we're yearning for those days when he'd stay where we left him! Not only has he learned to crawl, but he began going from a prone position to a sitting position by himself, as well as pulling up on ANYTHING he can get his little hands on...all at the same time. It's true what they say...that things change overnight!
The next day when I took Asher back to the new sitter's I said, "Asher crawled for the first time last night!" Then I realized. He had probably not done it for the first time in my sight. I caught what I had said, and remarked, "Oh....I bet he crawled at your house yesterday, didn't he?" She turned away & gave the best babysitter answer: "No...of course not!" She DID find it humorous that I had just told her the day before that he didn't crawl and now he was.
Jake & I are taking a crash course in babyproofing and I don't think I've said "no no" & "no, please" more than I have in the past week. To top it off, this is exhausting! With all these new stunts, Asher has revealed to us a new part of his personality...his unrelenting determination.
Going to bed and taking naps has become a battle. He has no time to slow down now, and he doesn't want to miss out on any action. Therefore, on top of his exhausting new tricks, we're getting little sleep. And, although we're worn out, I can truly say it is a joy to be a parent! Asher's new stunts may give us some gray hairs, though...or rather, me some gray hairs, and Jake a few more! ;)
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